my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
