worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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