Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
