you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize