Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
