Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
