Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
