You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
