this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
