You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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