We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
