You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
