I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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