i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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