You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
