Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize