If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
