do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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