you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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