last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
