Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
The uberlube is also flammable
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
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