You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
