I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
