super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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