i think i have herpe
just one?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
