Whatcha textin bout Willis?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
