so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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