I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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