This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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