Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize