I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Randomize
