and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
