Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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