Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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