I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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