Kareoke will never be a sober sport
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
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