No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
