goodnight i made you a song goodbye
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize