That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
