fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
He did a backflip because drugs
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
