can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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