A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize