so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
