How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize