Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
