dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
