Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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