Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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