Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Swine flu is the new snow day.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
