I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
well you can't waste a boner
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
When are your genitals available?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
