just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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