No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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