sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Damn victory sex feels great
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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