I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
